Why I try to never say "I know *exactly* how you feel."

Our dear friends are going through an incredibly difficult time right now, and it's only going to get more difficult. I feel so helpless at times like this, but am trying to support them however I can.

While there are certain parallels with situations I have been experienced in the past, I would never presume to fully understand what they are going through, what they are feeling, how they are coping. I would never say, "I know exactly how you feel."

I tried posting about this on another platform but there were tech issues: temporary, I know, but I needed to post about this today.

I have been on the receiving end of this kind of comment, decades ago. I understood that the other person was just expressing sympathy, and genuinely trying to offer support. But I confess there was always a tiny part of me that wanted to shout, "But you DON'T."

As someone who is constantly saying the wrong thing or afraid of saying the wrong thing, I get it.

I figure that all we can do is try to be kind - whatever side of the comment we find ourselves on- , to forgive and move on, and to learn something from the experience that will help us do better next time.